Yep.
Rule Number 5 in the Q Dimension: The police are only on patrol from 7 in the morning till 10 at night, so they can get plenty of sleep and be bright and breezy for the next day. Outside these hours, martial law is in force, and none other than Chuck Norris patrols the streets, keeping the citizens safe.
Roger stared bewildered at the person standing before him in the doorway. In fact, he was so bewildered, nay, aghast, nay, petri-mazi-fied that he stood stock still for several minutes, his mouth wide open like a 24-hour McDonalds in shock. (Though in saying that, I'm not entirely sure if the small town of Shock actually has a McDonalds but I'm assuming based on current trends that if they don't have one at the moment they'll get one in the next 6 months or so.)
There was an awkward silence.
*
A reasonably loud "THUD!" from the kitchen broke Roger from his reverie, as Cat returned to the floor, conveniently missing the remaining dynamite on his trip back to the lino.
"B...b....b....b.... who... or should I say... WHAT the heck are you???" Roger stuttered out in petri-mazement.
"Roger? You don't recognise me?" The yet-unnamed thing replied. "But we went to school together, grew up together, danced on the same ballet team together!"
Roger shook his head.
"I can't say I remember doing any of that with a 12 FOOT TALL GIRAFFE WEARING CHUCK TAYLORS AND A BATMAN COSTUME!!!" Roger cried, conveniently describing his visitor for the mystified reader of this blognovel.
"Oh, yes right." The giraffe replied. "I should also mention, I was forced into a shapeshifting machine by an evil genius (whose name, coincidentally, was E. Ville Jeenius) and this is how I came out. Handy if I ever want to play basketball, but a right pain in the bottom when it's time to get on a plane or in a spaceship."
"OH GREAT!" Roger shouted, being quite close to hysterics now (hysterics being the affectionate pet name Roger had given his door one time when he walked into it late one night. It's quite funny really, he got home late and was a bit drunk and he walked into the door and it was closed and it hurt and from then on he called it hysterics as a joke funny eh haha get it? No? Oh I guess you had to be there.) "THAT MAKES IT ALL OK THEN!"
"Settle down Roger old boy." The giraffe replied. "You see, I need your help with this wee conundrum. You are a space pilot after all, aren't you? And the nearest shapeshifter is 7000 trillion miles away. I knew you would help an old school mate in trouble because he's become a giraffe, I just knew you would."
Roger took a deep breath.
" " (that was the sound of him taking the breath)
"Well, you're right, I am a space pilot. And I did take the day off today because I sensed adventure. I guess I shouldn't be so surprised that a giraffe rocking Chucks and a Batman costume comes into it at some point, I mean, they're such a staple part of every good adventure story. But to be honest, Mr Giraffe, I still haven't got a clue who you are? You said you were my old school mate - well, before you were a giraffe, who on earth or any planet were you?"
The giraffe opened his mouth to answer,
and that is where this chapter will end! Muhahahahaha!
Previous Episode of Madness : : Next installment of insanity
Roger stared bewildered at the person standing before him in the doorway. In fact, he was so bewildered, nay, aghast, nay, petri-mazi-fied that he stood stock still for several minutes, his mouth wide open like a 24-hour McDonalds in shock. (Though in saying that, I'm not entirely sure if the small town of Shock actually has a McDonalds but I'm assuming based on current trends that if they don't have one at the moment they'll get one in the next 6 months or so.)
There was an awkward silence.
*
A reasonably loud "THUD!" from the kitchen broke Roger from his reverie, as Cat returned to the floor, conveniently missing the remaining dynamite on his trip back to the lino.
"B...b....b....b.... who... or should I say... WHAT the heck are you???" Roger stuttered out in petri-mazement.
"Roger? You don't recognise me?" The yet-unnamed thing replied. "But we went to school together, grew up together, danced on the same ballet team together!"
Roger shook his head.
"I can't say I remember doing any of that with a 12 FOOT TALL GIRAFFE WEARING CHUCK TAYLORS AND A BATMAN COSTUME!!!" Roger cried, conveniently describing his visitor for the mystified reader of this blognovel.
"Oh, yes right." The giraffe replied. "I should also mention, I was forced into a shapeshifting machine by an evil genius (whose name, coincidentally, was E. Ville Jeenius) and this is how I came out. Handy if I ever want to play basketball, but a right pain in the bottom when it's time to get on a plane or in a spaceship."
"OH GREAT!" Roger shouted, being quite close to hysterics now (hysterics being the affectionate pet name Roger had given his door one time when he walked into it late one night. It's quite funny really, he got home late and was a bit drunk and he walked into the door and it was closed and it hurt and from then on he called it hysterics as a joke funny eh haha get it? No? Oh I guess you had to be there.) "THAT MAKES IT ALL OK THEN!"
"Settle down Roger old boy." The giraffe replied. "You see, I need your help with this wee conundrum. You are a space pilot after all, aren't you? And the nearest shapeshifter is 7000 trillion miles away. I knew you would help an old school mate in trouble because he's become a giraffe, I just knew you would."
Roger took a deep breath.
" " (that was the sound of him taking the breath)
"Well, you're right, I am a space pilot. And I did take the day off today because I sensed adventure. I guess I shouldn't be so surprised that a giraffe rocking Chucks and a Batman costume comes into it at some point, I mean, they're such a staple part of every good adventure story. But to be honest, Mr Giraffe, I still haven't got a clue who you are? You said you were my old school mate - well, before you were a giraffe, who on earth or any planet were you?"
The giraffe opened his mouth to answer,
and that is where this chapter will end! Muhahahahaha!
Previous Episode of Madness : : Next installment of insanity
posted by Musings | 2:19 AM
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