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The World-Famous (to some people) online-novels of Lark and Musings, for you to sit back and enjoy in the quietness of your own home. Warning, all novels may contain traces of nuts, and insanity in large doses. (Reading hint: For more enjoyment and less wanting-to-die-from-how-stupid-it-all-is, L&M Blognovels are suggested read in smaller doses, rather than in one sitting).

Monday, January 16, 2006

You're the voice, try and understand it

"Is that Pete Wilson?" the voice asks, rather unneccessarily.
"Sure is," I reply, "but the question is, who are you?"
"Thats not important right now," the voice hisses like Susannah did to Eduardo when she was trying to warn him about the advances of Georgiana following Harold's departure for Alaska in When the Heart Stands Slowly, "What is important is that you get out of the house, right now. You are in incredible danger!"
"What do you mean?" I ask, disbelievingly.
"Look, just trust me," the voice pleads like Katherleen in Only Once Shall I Love You, when Lorenzo was threatening to leave her, following the revelation that her twin sister had actually been adopted, "Get out now!!"
"Why?" I ask stubbornly.
The voice sighs.
"Ok, if you need a reason, look out your living room window now, but don't be seen."
Deciding to humor the voice, I glance out of the window, just in time to see a sniper on my neighbors roof duck for cover.
"SCREAM!" I scream, and back away from the window quickly, so frightened by what I have just seen that I slipped out of present tense. I crouched behind my kitchen wall and held the phone up to my ear again.
"Ok, I believe you now," I apologised, "But now how do I get out of here?"
"First, calm down a little," the voice reassured me, "Terror won't help you escape. You have to think clearly."
"I'll try," I promised, and began taking deep breaths, slowing my racing heart rate down a little. When I began to feel more calm again, and my present tense returns, I ask, "Now what?"
"Here's what you do," the voice says, "Put on some loose clothes, which may help to deflect bullets if you are fired on. Then keep your head down, and do the following. Remember, there are three snipers on your house, so they will see you leaving unless you are very careful. The issue is not whether they see you, but whether they can get a clear shot. Do as I say, and you'll be alright. If you escape, make your way to Reduced-Price-Mart. I'll send someone to meet you there."
"Okay," I say as I listen to the voice's advice, "I'll do my best. This better work though."
"Look on the bright side," the voice says, "If it doesn't, you won't have long to worry about it."
"Gosh, thanks," I mutter.

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