My Life as a Disembodied Voice

Rule Number 20 in the Q Dimension: No dessert until you finish your vegetables.

Whoa!
What happened?
Where am I?
I seem to be a disembodied voice, floating in a void and talking to myself in a first-person inner monologue.
Weird.
I can see a scene unfolding somewhere below me, and watch it curiously. It somehow seems familiar.
A human figure who I seem to recognise as being called “Harold” is busy trying to close a cupboard without getting sucked into the miniature black hole within it. Currently this attempt involves hanging on to a doorpost with both arms while his feet dangle precariously towards the void, screaming at the top of his lungs. Other objects in the room, not being as heavy, are being pulled towards the black hole much more easily. I see a pile of dust get picked up by the pull of the black hole and disappear within it.
Whoa!
What happened?
Where am I?
You’re here in the void.
What? Who are you?
I think I’m Roger. Who are you?
Uh… Percy? What just happened?
Well, I think I might have got sucked into a black hole, and then maybe you did too. What do you remember?
I was laughing... there was a TV going...
...it was Full House.
Really? That's an awful programme.
Whoa!
What happened?
Where am I?
Wait, who are you?
I’m Knarl Kickles. Who are you?
Uh, I’m Roger, and this is Percy.
Hi.
Nice to meet you.
Wait, didn't you get zapped into dust?
Well, yes.
Me too!
MAAAARTINN!!!!
Larry? Oh no, not you as well.
So where are we?
In the black hole.
MAAARTINN!!!
The black hole? I guess its better than being dust.
I’ll say. I was just a throwaway joke and now I’m featuring in another chapter! This is great!
Wait, who said that? This is so confusing.
I think that was Knarl.
Oh, that makes sense.
MAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRR….
Stop it Larry!
…tin?
That’s better.
Okay girls. Lets pick a name for our new puppy.
What the heck? Who’s that?
Michelle do you have a name for the puppy?
Oooh! I love this episode.
What?
Yes I do. Michelle.
This is a Full House episode!
So… the TV got sucked in here?
I guess so.
That's your name.
Oh no! I’ve got to get out of here. I hate Full House.
Roger, is that you?
I like my name.
MAAAAARTIN!!!
ROGER? You’re here too? And you’re not a photo of Lindsay Lohan?
Mr. Bear and I have the perfect name. Mr.Dog!
No. I guess being a disembodied voice means I can’t also be an inanimate object.
Guys! I’m trying to listen to the show, can you keep it down a bit?
Mr.Dog? Steph when you have a kid someday what are you going to name it? Mr.Baby?
I’ll get you out of here! Just let my manliness show you to the exit.
What manliness Knarl? You’re disembodied too.
Not if its a girl.
Wait? No body? Does that mean I don't have my beard??!! Nooo!!!
So we’re trapped here?
I think we should name him something that fits his personality. Like... Puddles.
Unless Harold can somehow reverse the black hole.
We all pause and look at Harold, who is still hanging on to the doorpost and screaming like a girl.
Dad I have the perfect name! Comet. Because he's fast and he has a tail.
Hmmm… I think we might be stuck here.
Nooo!! This is so confusing!!
And he only hits the newspaper once every 76 years.
Ha! I love that line!
MAAAARTINNN!!!!
You called?

And suddenly, we were all saved by Martin.

Previous Chapter *** Next Chapter